Last night I had a dream that I joined a singing group and I got told off for being louder than everyone else, and it’s basically just a flashback to when I was 15 and rehearsing for Oliver and my teacher who was standing at the back of the hall just marched forward yelling at everyone else that the group isn’t loud enough and the only person he could even hear properly was me and proceeded to stand me infront of everyone like ‘Have you seen this tiny little person? She’s the only one making any noise right now’ and it was sort of mortifying and everyone glared at me, but also I was really proud of myself… idk that was so unnecessary I just felt like sharing.

Okay, just because, if I don’t get it out, then it will rattle around my brain all night:

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And in a truly shocking turn of events, the guy I like has a girlfriend. Because such is my life.

Gym again today.

I hurt.

feeling very very not well this morning T-T.

I have to go do shopping for food but I can’t move and my head is pounding and just… ugh.

So I managed to do my knee in on the plane going to Italy… and it was mostly fine all week but now it’s hurting really bad T-T.

I found a post about Science = Reality and it sent me on a very long rant in my own head about how ‘well duh the only way that it isn’t reality is if this universe is just a construct and nothing in it is actually real in which case the science of the world creating this one is what’s real’ and that very quickly spiraled out of control and lead me down a rabbit hole of thoughts on what might or might not be reality and it got a bit existential and then a little bit scary…

and now i don’t want to go to sleep.

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So i sent my mum and dad a text earlier.

"Just got almost knocked down by the tiniest dog imaginable". Which I did and it was hilarious… unfortunately my dad’s phone screen is diddy so only the first half of it was visible on opening the text so apparently my mum freaked out because she thought I’d nearly been run over by a car or something…



Do I pay Lab fees AND standard fees… or do I pay one or the other??? I JUST DON’T KNOW nobody is telling me things >-<!!!

I don’t think Ikano wants me to pay what I owe on my statements.

Three times this month I have logged in with no trouble whatsoever, the moment I get an email saying my statement is ready to be viewed, suddenly the information they have doesn’t match what I give them… and the exact same thing happened last month as well (where i was able to log in days before but not after the statement came out). And it didn’t matter then, because I remembered how much I owed and was able to pay it the informal way, but now it’s just a regular minimum payment and I can’t remember exactly how much it is, it’s only like £3 something, but if I don’t pay it I get in trouble… and even though it’s not much I don’t want to pay more than I owe.


I know the information I need to log in is correct, I know it is! I couldn’t have gotten the card if it was incorrect and it’s personal information, so I think I’d remember it!

Guess who is starting a Master’s degree in Television and Film Production this September.

That’s right.

This girl!

My tutor finally got back to me thank GOD >_< 

having a freakout over here.

applications are stressful.

Everything is getting to me today.